Yesterday was 75 degrees! An amazing number for late October. I decided to declare it a "personal" day and spent the day biking around Manhattan and hanging out in Central Park. I know it's odd to have days off when you are not working but it really did feel like a day off. I didn't dwell on job stuff or lack their off or on pre-natal stuff or on anything really besides the colors of the trees and soaking in vitamin D.
Today is back to normal with gray skies and the temperature dropping by the hour getting to 50 by the end of the day, and I am back at my computer trying to figure out what is wrong with me.
Right now Mr. T is finally earning enough money to support both of us. In many ways it doesn't make sense to take on a full time job right now because I will obviously want at least 3 months off, so the logical thing would be for me to start volunteering somewhere. But I can't seem to make myself do that. I know I need to put ego aside and take the plunge but it's so humiliating to put myself out there as free labor to a group that I know I am qualified to work for. Last year I sucked it up and applied for an unpaid internship at an org. I like. The woman called me in for an interview and then started almost yelling at me asking what my problem is with all my experience why don't I get a real job?
I worked unpaid for these women on and off for 6 months last year and it ended horrifically. I think I am still in shell shock from all these experiences. I am so stuck.
On a different note along with random jobs I am now searching for apartments on Craigs list, it would be nice to live somewhere where we can get a dog and where we might feel like we are in a vibrant city as opposed to a bizarre sub-universe. So yesterday evening I went to look at a place. The 2 front doors were unlocked, the elevator smelled even worse than ours! We got upstairs and there were strange sounds coming out of the empty and hastily remodeled apartment. We took a careful step inside to see a pigeon stuck in the kitchen desperately trying to get out the partially opened window. He kept banging his head and fluttering his wings. It's not often that I am overcome with sympathy for a flying rat, but his situation was sad. The kitchen was really small and the bird very frustrated so I didn't feel like I could go in and open the window further for him. I wonder how long the poor guy had been in there.
Last year I read The Year of Living Biblically, where A J Jacobs attempted to follow everyone of the 613 biblical commandments. There are a bunch of commandments relating to slavery so he decided that the best way to fulfill those requirements was to get an intern or a modern day slave. In Jacob's vein I bring you todays craigslist posting:
freelance designer looking for "creative" doctor (brooklyn)
Date: 2009-10-22, 2:42PM EDT
Reply to: gigs-rtgva-1433035600@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
I'm horribly sick and it sucks. I don't have a regular paycheck yet alone health insurance because all of you people insist I work for free, so I can't offer any money. But it will be great exposure for a doctor (you might get sick!)... you will be given credit on my website and with my friends for prescribing me drugs, and it could potentially lead to some paying work in the future. Sound good?
* Location: brooklyn
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
* Compensation: would you ask a doctor to work for free? no? THEN WHY SHOULD I?
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