Shower Door Mechanic
Date: 2009-10-28, 11:05AM EDT
Reply to: joe@triviewshowerdoor.com [Errors when replying to ads?]
Mature responsible individual with experience ONLY
Full Time TOP PAY$$$$$$
Please reply to joe@triviewshowerdoor.com or Fax resume to (516) 338-4173,
Contact Joe at (516) 338-4170 or (516) 315-3647
* Compensation: TOP PAY$$$$$$
Top pay to fix shower doors, what??? What about curtains do you get top dollar for them too? It's been rainy and cold for 2 days now and I haven't left the apartment yet today - never ever ever a good thing for my mental health. Maybe I should start fixing shower doors around town.
I am feeling pretty useless and sluggish.
I read Jonathan Safraen Foer's piece about vegetarianism in the NY Times magazine from a couple weeks ago. He talks about how having kids made him confront his own hypocricy:
"The shame of parenthood - which is a good shame - is that we want our children to be more whole than we are, to have satisfactory answers. My children not only inspired me to reconsider what kind of eating animal I would be, but also shamed me into reconsideration. And then, one day, they will choose for themselves. I don't know what my reaction will be if they decide to eat meat. (I don't know what my reaction will be if they decide to renounce their Judaism, root for the Red Sox or register Republican.) I'm not as worried about what they will choose as much as my ability to make them conscious of the choices before them. I wont measure my success as a parent by whether my children share my values, but by whether they act according to their own."
This feels like an important reminder to me. I constantly find myself thinking, what if my kid doesn't like spicy food? What if they are interested in something totally boring like fire trucks? What if I can't relate. I want to try hard to keep the idea in my head that as long as they believe in something and can articulate and defend it then it's something.
I was joking with a friend that this baby is the most conservative creature ever because it waited until we were legally married and until at least one of us was gainfully employed and with insurance to show up on the scene. But what if it's not a joke what if this baby really does have a conservative traditionalist bent? the thought terrifies me!
I am feeling very pessimistic at the prospect of finding a job before I start showing and it becomes too complicated. I need some focus for these next few months. . . I feel like a broken record.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Monday, October 26, 2009
Computers
My workhorse of a computer has been rebelling and is now at the doctor. The thought of losing her is very very distressing. The worst part about it is that I have a beloved and pirated version of final cut pro that could not be replaced if I had to get a new hard drive. Every time i turn around or stop using the poor thing for a few minutes she shuts down. It will be a few days before I hear anything.
On friday a job I had applied to 6 weeks ago and was really excited about and feel uniquely qualified for was reposted on Idealist. It feels like a real blow when that happens. I decided to resend my application in the off chance that they had failed to read it the first time around. My brother told me that when he was working somewhere he posted a job then got busy with other stuff and a month later instead of going through all those old emails he decided to repost the position and start from scratch. Lazy employers have no idea how much unnecessary stress and emotional turmoil they cause us unemployed Joes!
In the last few months I have gotten various mass emails from friends and acquaintances soliciting my help in their jobsearch. It always makes me laugh, as if I can help any one! But I know they are being good unemployed boys and girls and doing the networking steps but I don't really know what I would be networking for, which makes the unpleasant task that much less manageable!
I feel like I get out of breath way faster than I used to, a simple hill and I am panting, it's troubling.
We have an election coming up here in NYC today I saw job postings from both candidates. I wish I liked or could even tolerate either of them to be able to work for them because it would be a good way to make a few bucks.
Here's a sampling of their job offers!
WANT A REAL MAYOR? – Campaign positions
Date: 2009-10-26, 4:16PM EDT
Reply to: job-y3g9g-1438723128@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Wanted: Concerned citizens who do not want to see Michael Bloomberg re-elected.
Its time to elect a REAL Mayor, not hand it over to someone who wants to buy it.
The current Mayor decided eight years was not enough time to make sure the city was unaffordable to all but the wealthiest New Yorkers. Now he wants four more years.
We need someone who will grow the economy, expand access to affordable housing, and address the challenges in our education system.
Responsibilities:
Direct voter contact, id, & education
Requirements:
• Strong communication skills
• Confident
• Energetic
• Interest in campaign work and the democratic process
Some college strongly preferred
Please send your resume and a brief description of why you are interested in working on the campaign:
HIRING IMMEDIATELY FROM NOW UNTIL ELECTION DAY TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 3RD.
FT/PT/Temp work, flexible schedule.
Bilingual a bonus, EOE
Contact us TODAY:
Email (preferable): work4thompson@gmail.com
Phone: 212.608.6555 x142
www.thompson2009.com
Campaign Positions Available (NYC)
Date: 2009-10-25, 6:41PM EDT
Reply to: resumes@mikebloomberg2009.com [Errors when replying to ads?]
Bloomberg for Mayor 2009 is seeking individuals to take an active role in supporting the Mayor’s re-election campaign during an important time for New York City.
Individuals will have one-on-one contact with voters on a daily basis. They will learn about neighborhood issues and campaign strategy.
Interested applicants should be well-spoken, persuasive, confident, and hard working. Bi-lingual applicants preferred but not mandatory.
Applicants should be available to work afternoons and evenings and weekends.
We are looking to fill paid hourly positions starting immediately with food provided.
If you are interested, please email a resume to resumes@mikebloomberg2009.com.
I'm planning on voting for Reverend Billy, founder of the Church of Life After Shopping. I may volunteer for them but they obviously have no $$
On friday a job I had applied to 6 weeks ago and was really excited about and feel uniquely qualified for was reposted on Idealist. It feels like a real blow when that happens. I decided to resend my application in the off chance that they had failed to read it the first time around. My brother told me that when he was working somewhere he posted a job then got busy with other stuff and a month later instead of going through all those old emails he decided to repost the position and start from scratch. Lazy employers have no idea how much unnecessary stress and emotional turmoil they cause us unemployed Joes!
In the last few months I have gotten various mass emails from friends and acquaintances soliciting my help in their jobsearch. It always makes me laugh, as if I can help any one! But I know they are being good unemployed boys and girls and doing the networking steps but I don't really know what I would be networking for, which makes the unpleasant task that much less manageable!
I feel like I get out of breath way faster than I used to, a simple hill and I am panting, it's troubling.
We have an election coming up here in NYC today I saw job postings from both candidates. I wish I liked or could even tolerate either of them to be able to work for them because it would be a good way to make a few bucks.
Here's a sampling of their job offers!
WANT A REAL MAYOR? – Campaign positions
Date: 2009-10-26, 4:16PM EDT
Reply to: job-y3g9g-1438723128@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Wanted: Concerned citizens who do not want to see Michael Bloomberg re-elected.
Its time to elect a REAL Mayor, not hand it over to someone who wants to buy it.
The current Mayor decided eight years was not enough time to make sure the city was unaffordable to all but the wealthiest New Yorkers. Now he wants four more years.
We need someone who will grow the economy, expand access to affordable housing, and address the challenges in our education system.
Responsibilities:
Direct voter contact, id, & education
Requirements:
• Strong communication skills
• Confident
• Energetic
• Interest in campaign work and the democratic process
Some college strongly preferred
Please send your resume and a brief description of why you are interested in working on the campaign:
HIRING IMMEDIATELY FROM NOW UNTIL ELECTION DAY TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 3RD.
FT/PT/Temp work, flexible schedule.
Bilingual a bonus, EOE
Contact us TODAY:
Email (preferable): work4thompson@gmail.com
Phone: 212.608.6555 x142
www.thompson2009.com
Campaign Positions Available (NYC)
Date: 2009-10-25, 6:41PM EDT
Reply to: resumes@mikebloomberg2009.com [Errors when replying to ads?]
Bloomberg for Mayor 2009 is seeking individuals to take an active role in supporting the Mayor’s re-election campaign during an important time for New York City.
Individuals will have one-on-one contact with voters on a daily basis. They will learn about neighborhood issues and campaign strategy.
Interested applicants should be well-spoken, persuasive, confident, and hard working. Bi-lingual applicants preferred but not mandatory.
Applicants should be available to work afternoons and evenings and weekends.
We are looking to fill paid hourly positions starting immediately with food provided.
If you are interested, please email a resume to resumes@mikebloomberg2009.com.
I'm planning on voting for Reverend Billy, founder of the Church of Life After Shopping. I may volunteer for them but they obviously have no $$
Friday, October 23, 2009
What is a day off when you are unemployed?
Yesterday was 75 degrees! An amazing number for late October. I decided to declare it a "personal" day and spent the day biking around Manhattan and hanging out in Central Park. I know it's odd to have days off when you are not working but it really did feel like a day off. I didn't dwell on job stuff or lack their off or on pre-natal stuff or on anything really besides the colors of the trees and soaking in vitamin D.
Today is back to normal with gray skies and the temperature dropping by the hour getting to 50 by the end of the day, and I am back at my computer trying to figure out what is wrong with me.
Right now Mr. T is finally earning enough money to support both of us. In many ways it doesn't make sense to take on a full time job right now because I will obviously want at least 3 months off, so the logical thing would be for me to start volunteering somewhere. But I can't seem to make myself do that. I know I need to put ego aside and take the plunge but it's so humiliating to put myself out there as free labor to a group that I know I am qualified to work for. Last year I sucked it up and applied for an unpaid internship at an org. I like. The woman called me in for an interview and then started almost yelling at me asking what my problem is with all my experience why don't I get a real job?
I worked unpaid for these women on and off for 6 months last year and it ended horrifically. I think I am still in shell shock from all these experiences. I am so stuck.
On a different note along with random jobs I am now searching for apartments on Craigs list, it would be nice to live somewhere where we can get a dog and where we might feel like we are in a vibrant city as opposed to a bizarre sub-universe. So yesterday evening I went to look at a place. The 2 front doors were unlocked, the elevator smelled even worse than ours! We got upstairs and there were strange sounds coming out of the empty and hastily remodeled apartment. We took a careful step inside to see a pigeon stuck in the kitchen desperately trying to get out the partially opened window. He kept banging his head and fluttering his wings. It's not often that I am overcome with sympathy for a flying rat, but his situation was sad. The kitchen was really small and the bird very frustrated so I didn't feel like I could go in and open the window further for him. I wonder how long the poor guy had been in there.
Last year I read The Year of Living Biblically, where A J Jacobs attempted to follow everyone of the 613 biblical commandments. There are a bunch of commandments relating to slavery so he decided that the best way to fulfill those requirements was to get an intern or a modern day slave. In Jacob's vein I bring you todays craigslist posting:
freelance designer looking for "creative" doctor (brooklyn)
Date: 2009-10-22, 2:42PM EDT
Reply to: gigs-rtgva-1433035600@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
I'm horribly sick and it sucks. I don't have a regular paycheck yet alone health insurance because all of you people insist I work for free, so I can't offer any money. But it will be great exposure for a doctor (you might get sick!)... you will be given credit on my website and with my friends for prescribing me drugs, and it could potentially lead to some paying work in the future. Sound good?
* Location: brooklyn
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
* Compensation: would you ask a doctor to work for free? no? THEN WHY SHOULD I?
Today is back to normal with gray skies and the temperature dropping by the hour getting to 50 by the end of the day, and I am back at my computer trying to figure out what is wrong with me.
Right now Mr. T is finally earning enough money to support both of us. In many ways it doesn't make sense to take on a full time job right now because I will obviously want at least 3 months off, so the logical thing would be for me to start volunteering somewhere. But I can't seem to make myself do that. I know I need to put ego aside and take the plunge but it's so humiliating to put myself out there as free labor to a group that I know I am qualified to work for. Last year I sucked it up and applied for an unpaid internship at an org. I like. The woman called me in for an interview and then started almost yelling at me asking what my problem is with all my experience why don't I get a real job?
I worked unpaid for these women on and off for 6 months last year and it ended horrifically. I think I am still in shell shock from all these experiences. I am so stuck.
On a different note along with random jobs I am now searching for apartments on Craigs list, it would be nice to live somewhere where we can get a dog and where we might feel like we are in a vibrant city as opposed to a bizarre sub-universe. So yesterday evening I went to look at a place. The 2 front doors were unlocked, the elevator smelled even worse than ours! We got upstairs and there were strange sounds coming out of the empty and hastily remodeled apartment. We took a careful step inside to see a pigeon stuck in the kitchen desperately trying to get out the partially opened window. He kept banging his head and fluttering his wings. It's not often that I am overcome with sympathy for a flying rat, but his situation was sad. The kitchen was really small and the bird very frustrated so I didn't feel like I could go in and open the window further for him. I wonder how long the poor guy had been in there.
Last year I read The Year of Living Biblically, where A J Jacobs attempted to follow everyone of the 613 biblical commandments. There are a bunch of commandments relating to slavery so he decided that the best way to fulfill those requirements was to get an intern or a modern day slave. In Jacob's vein I bring you todays craigslist posting:
freelance designer looking for "creative" doctor (brooklyn)
Date: 2009-10-22, 2:42PM EDT
Reply to: gigs-rtgva-1433035600@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
I'm horribly sick and it sucks. I don't have a regular paycheck yet alone health insurance because all of you people insist I work for free, so I can't offer any money. But it will be great exposure for a doctor (you might get sick!)... you will be given credit on my website and with my friends for prescribing me drugs, and it could potentially lead to some paying work in the future. Sound good?
* Location: brooklyn
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
* Compensation: would you ask a doctor to work for free? no? THEN WHY SHOULD I?
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Feeling drained
What does it mean when you wake up after 8 hours of sleep and you feel completely exhausted? I had a dream that someone left a paper bag with $3 million in it for me at a diner and then I had to chase this creep all over Central Park to try to get it back.
Yesterday we had a 20 minute consultation with a new midwife. She has been practicing for years and is very no nonsense, Mr. T liked her a lot, I felt intimidated by her. But she looked us in the eye and fit us in to her busy schedule and gave undivided attention for those 20 minutes, which Mr. T says are all really good signs. When she realized that I was at 10 weeks she asked if we'd heard the heartbeat yet, we said no. She asked her waiting patient if she could wait just a little longer and we moved to a room with a fetal heart device. She couldn't find the heart beat which she made us both repeat means nothing! But it was disappointing.
I managed to send out 2 resumes in a 20 minute period yesterday both for well paying temporary positions that I feel completely qualified for, both would be perfect but I'm not crossing my fingers.
I decided to make an appointment with yesterday's person and not think about this stuff for a while, it's too draining. I still think I might be more inclined to do a home birth but I'm gonna put it on hold for a while. This is just the beginning of endless decisions we will have to make, or so I'm told. Being a parent in our fear mongering culture has everyone on high alert and completely convinced that every decision they make can mean total destruction for the child.
I have been scouring Craigslist for something juicy. The best I can come up with is something offensive and odd:
Little people needed for month of November (Manhattan)
Date: 2009-10-20, 9:56AM EDT
Reply to: job-2hjrk-1429490770@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Little person or people needed to work as gallery assistant for a one month long gallery show in Manhattan, which will be simultaneously filmed as a pilot for a new reality tv show showcasing the art world. Work would be part time through the month of November, 20-30 hours at 500 a week. Please contact as soon as possible.
Yesterday we had a 20 minute consultation with a new midwife. She has been practicing for years and is very no nonsense, Mr. T liked her a lot, I felt intimidated by her. But she looked us in the eye and fit us in to her busy schedule and gave undivided attention for those 20 minutes, which Mr. T says are all really good signs. When she realized that I was at 10 weeks she asked if we'd heard the heartbeat yet, we said no. She asked her waiting patient if she could wait just a little longer and we moved to a room with a fetal heart device. She couldn't find the heart beat which she made us both repeat means nothing! But it was disappointing.
I managed to send out 2 resumes in a 20 minute period yesterday both for well paying temporary positions that I feel completely qualified for, both would be perfect but I'm not crossing my fingers.
I decided to make an appointment with yesterday's person and not think about this stuff for a while, it's too draining. I still think I might be more inclined to do a home birth but I'm gonna put it on hold for a while. This is just the beginning of endless decisions we will have to make, or so I'm told. Being a parent in our fear mongering culture has everyone on high alert and completely convinced that every decision they make can mean total destruction for the child.
I have been scouring Craigslist for something juicy. The best I can come up with is something offensive and odd:
Little people needed for month of November (Manhattan)
Date: 2009-10-20, 9:56AM EDT
Reply to: job-2hjrk-1429490770@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Little person or people needed to work as gallery assistant for a one month long gallery show in Manhattan, which will be simultaneously filmed as a pilot for a new reality tv show showcasing the art world. Work would be part time through the month of November, 20-30 hours at 500 a week. Please contact as soon as possible.
Monday, October 19, 2009
finding a practioner sucks
I made an appointment 5 weeks ago at a place called Clementine midwiferey. They have offices in Park slope and are affiliated with St. Vincents hospital in Manhattan. A friend of a friend who is a doula and has researched the shit out of this stuff said they were her top recommendation for a midwife in all of New York. And they were in my network so I tought everything would be great. Thursday afternoon at 4 PM I get an email from them that they don't have any more openings for May deliveries and would be cancelling my Monday appointment. I was in shock that they would cancel 2 days before when I had made the appointment so many weeks earlier, you would think if they didn't have room they could have noticed earlier! I asked the charming office manager if I could come in for a first appointment since it was such short notice and then have more time to find someone else to work with. She said NO!
Turns out union insurance is not the most progressive in the world. There's no paternity leave and only a very limited and rather odd bunch of midwives are considered in-network. I went against my better judgement and made an appointment with a midwife who is connected to St. Vincents hospital and does not have a single review on-line. Apparently she's been working for 23 years and there is literally not a review of her anywhere. She was so much worse than I ever imagianed she would be. The office is located on the 9th floor of the spellman ward in the hospital, the creaky elevator barely made it up that high. We walk in and they start throwing documents at us to fill out. I asked if I could use the bathroom and they threw a cup for a urine sample in my hands and declared that my husband could start on the paper work. It shocked me that in NYC in 2009 anyone would make the assumption that he was my husband. The waiting room was freezing. I asked for water because I was thirsty after the ride over, they told me they didn't have water. The examining room was like an icebox. And the midwife finally came in and immediately started going over my medical history then asked if I had any questions. I said no. She said no questions? And Mr. T said do you mean questions about our medical history? And she said no questions about anything.
It went downhill from there. I could not have connected less with this woman. Turns out there are 2 midwives and 3 doctors in her practice and any one of them can be there for labor. I asked if I could meet the others and she said if that mattered to me she could arrange it. Then she started listing all the diseases that she would recommend testing for immediately and started advertising some new and expensive procedure where you save your placenta in a cord bank. She suggested that I take the survey even if i am not interested because I would get a $50 gift card. That's when we decided to leave her office before she tried to touch me or things got any worse.
We walked out to the freezing cold NY morning and i started to cry. Mr. T went to work but agreed to revisit the idea of doing a home birth. Home births seem to be quite trendy in Brooklyn these days. I was scared by the idea because the hospital closest to our apartment is not supposed to be very good but after today's experience it is looking more and more appealing.
I have another consultation with someone also connected to St. Vincents but who has her own office in Manhattan, tomorrow. I also made an appointment to visit the Brooklyn birthing center.
How do people with jobs have time to deal with all this crap? It's such a headache, so stressful and time consuming and I have time to put in to it!
After the appointment i had to take a long walk to decompress and talked to my mom about her births, they were all natural and without any complications. She also confessed that she didn't see a doctor when she was pregnant with my brother until she was 6 months pregnant! Ahh the 70's.
Needless to say I haven't had much time to look for jobs today so no cute Craigslist postings on this 19th of OCtober. . .
Turns out union insurance is not the most progressive in the world. There's no paternity leave and only a very limited and rather odd bunch of midwives are considered in-network. I went against my better judgement and made an appointment with a midwife who is connected to St. Vincents hospital and does not have a single review on-line. Apparently she's been working for 23 years and there is literally not a review of her anywhere. She was so much worse than I ever imagianed she would be. The office is located on the 9th floor of the spellman ward in the hospital, the creaky elevator barely made it up that high. We walk in and they start throwing documents at us to fill out. I asked if I could use the bathroom and they threw a cup for a urine sample in my hands and declared that my husband could start on the paper work. It shocked me that in NYC in 2009 anyone would make the assumption that he was my husband. The waiting room was freezing. I asked for water because I was thirsty after the ride over, they told me they didn't have water. The examining room was like an icebox. And the midwife finally came in and immediately started going over my medical history then asked if I had any questions. I said no. She said no questions? And Mr. T said do you mean questions about our medical history? And she said no questions about anything.
It went downhill from there. I could not have connected less with this woman. Turns out there are 2 midwives and 3 doctors in her practice and any one of them can be there for labor. I asked if I could meet the others and she said if that mattered to me she could arrange it. Then she started listing all the diseases that she would recommend testing for immediately and started advertising some new and expensive procedure where you save your placenta in a cord bank. She suggested that I take the survey even if i am not interested because I would get a $50 gift card. That's when we decided to leave her office before she tried to touch me or things got any worse.
We walked out to the freezing cold NY morning and i started to cry. Mr. T went to work but agreed to revisit the idea of doing a home birth. Home births seem to be quite trendy in Brooklyn these days. I was scared by the idea because the hospital closest to our apartment is not supposed to be very good but after today's experience it is looking more and more appealing.
I have another consultation with someone also connected to St. Vincents but who has her own office in Manhattan, tomorrow. I also made an appointment to visit the Brooklyn birthing center.
How do people with jobs have time to deal with all this crap? It's such a headache, so stressful and time consuming and I have time to put in to it!
After the appointment i had to take a long walk to decompress and talked to my mom about her births, they were all natural and without any complications. She also confessed that she didn't see a doctor when she was pregnant with my brother until she was 6 months pregnant! Ahh the 70's.
Needless to say I haven't had much time to look for jobs today so no cute Craigslist postings on this 19th of OCtober. . .
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Hungry Hungry hippo
I woke up at 4:30 this morning to pee. Nothing new there it's been a long time since I haven't peed at least once in the middle of the night. But I was starving, out of control starving. I lay in bed and my stomach was grumbling. Finally Mr. T brought me a candy and some water. He decided that it was a great time to be awake and start writing as he laughed about the foreign idea of waking up every two hours.
It's in the 40's and profoundly gray outside and has just started raining. I made a potato spinach dish for breakfast and am already hungry again, really hungry. IT's Out of Control! I got freaked out last night that I was going to get gestational diabetes because I've been eating so much sugar but luckily that doesn't kick in till week 28! I've been eating a lot of sugar compared to my normal life but I don't know if objectively speaking it qualifies as an insane amount of sugar.
I have yet to send a resume out this week. There's just nothing out there! It's so discouraging. It makes me feel trapped.
At our wedding in August two of Mr. T's good friends got up and told the embarrassing story of the night we met. One of them said that Mr. T has always been attracted to women who look like men, short hair etc. women who you have to glance twice to make sure it's really a girl, as he said. Then the other jumped in and corrected that there was never a doubt about my gender on that first drunken night but he did like my buzz cut.
Anyway this job posting feels oddly appropriate:
Looking for Lesbian to pose nude.
Date: 2009-10-15, 4:10AM EDT
Reply to: gigs-amkek-1422227061@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Looking for butch lesbians who might look like a guy in close, but out of close, she is all woman. This is a private project, and it is Art. This project is for Butch lesbians who are proud of their womanly shape despite their tom boy appearance. The shoot will be TFP and yes you can bring an escort or who ever. Please contact me if you are interested in the shoot.
It's in the 40's and profoundly gray outside and has just started raining. I made a potato spinach dish for breakfast and am already hungry again, really hungry. IT's Out of Control! I got freaked out last night that I was going to get gestational diabetes because I've been eating so much sugar but luckily that doesn't kick in till week 28! I've been eating a lot of sugar compared to my normal life but I don't know if objectively speaking it qualifies as an insane amount of sugar.
I have yet to send a resume out this week. There's just nothing out there! It's so discouraging. It makes me feel trapped.
At our wedding in August two of Mr. T's good friends got up and told the embarrassing story of the night we met. One of them said that Mr. T has always been attracted to women who look like men, short hair etc. women who you have to glance twice to make sure it's really a girl, as he said. Then the other jumped in and corrected that there was never a doubt about my gender on that first drunken night but he did like my buzz cut.
Anyway this job posting feels oddly appropriate:
Looking for Lesbian to pose nude.
Date: 2009-10-15, 4:10AM EDT
Reply to: gigs-amkek-1422227061@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Looking for butch lesbians who might look like a guy in close, but out of close, she is all woman. This is a private project, and it is Art. This project is for Butch lesbians who are proud of their womanly shape despite their tom boy appearance. The shoot will be TFP and yes you can bring an escort or who ever. Please contact me if you are interested in the shoot.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
being upside down is good
Am feeling pretty blaa this morning, maybe I should do this!
Editor/Proofreader Wanted
Date: 2009-10-14, 10:17AM EDT
Reply to: job-95qqs-1420864569@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Looking for an editor willing to work for trade of aerial lessons (aerial tissu, static trapeze, lyra).
Sitting in a chair all day long is bad for the body and the spirit! Being upside down is a great way to cleanse your "reality" palate.
Please email resume and short paragraph about yourself.
I can't seem to drink coffee without running to the bathroom but I also can't make it through a morning without coffee, how do people do it? A friend of mine made it through college, and graduate school without a sip of coffee. She has bad insomnia and was convinced that even a morning cup would keep her up at night. Now at the age of 29 forever and a few years she has suddenly discovered the wonders of coffee and is a serious junkie convert. She has no idea how she survived the last 30 odd years of life and school. She criticizes certain coffee and pops sleeping pills at night. Watching her drink and drool over coffee was as shocking as if she had been shooting heroin in front of me! I know it's really bad to have too much caffeine when you're pregnant though I haven't read anything that completely convinces me that it's bad. . . most of the coffee I drink seems to be shooting right through me which is good because I am also finding myself supplementing my beer cravings with chocolate. I never tried a peanutbutter twix till last week, I can't believe I went so long without that in my life!
How I'm keeping busy this week:
1. I got hired in June to write the annual report for an org. I used to work for. It was supposed to be a summer project. It's now mid-October and the freakin thing is not done yet!
2. A friend and I started a CSA in our neighborhood last year. This week has been devoted to trying to find a replacement team to take over major responsibilities for next year. So far not many people are responding.
3. Organizing Mr T.'s February book tour, trying to find independent bookstores in the bookstore abyss that is most of this country.
4. Scanning Idealist and Craigslist for something that will give me structure and money for the next few months.
5. Coming up with recipes for the mother cabbage we have in our fridge from the CSA this week.
It's in the 40's right now and getting dark by 6:15. Winter is looming.
Editor/Proofreader Wanted
Date: 2009-10-14, 10:17AM EDT
Reply to: job-95qqs-1420864569@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Looking for an editor willing to work for trade of aerial lessons (aerial tissu, static trapeze, lyra).
Sitting in a chair all day long is bad for the body and the spirit! Being upside down is a great way to cleanse your "reality" palate.
Please email resume and short paragraph about yourself.
I can't seem to drink coffee without running to the bathroom but I also can't make it through a morning without coffee, how do people do it? A friend of mine made it through college, and graduate school without a sip of coffee. She has bad insomnia and was convinced that even a morning cup would keep her up at night. Now at the age of 29 forever and a few years she has suddenly discovered the wonders of coffee and is a serious junkie convert. She has no idea how she survived the last 30 odd years of life and school. She criticizes certain coffee and pops sleeping pills at night. Watching her drink and drool over coffee was as shocking as if she had been shooting heroin in front of me! I know it's really bad to have too much caffeine when you're pregnant though I haven't read anything that completely convinces me that it's bad. . . most of the coffee I drink seems to be shooting right through me which is good because I am also finding myself supplementing my beer cravings with chocolate. I never tried a peanutbutter twix till last week, I can't believe I went so long without that in my life!
How I'm keeping busy this week:
1. I got hired in June to write the annual report for an org. I used to work for. It was supposed to be a summer project. It's now mid-October and the freakin thing is not done yet!
2. A friend and I started a CSA in our neighborhood last year. This week has been devoted to trying to find a replacement team to take over major responsibilities for next year. So far not many people are responding.
3. Organizing Mr T.'s February book tour, trying to find independent bookstores in the bookstore abyss that is most of this country.
4. Scanning Idealist and Craigslist for something that will give me structure and money for the next few months.
5. Coming up with recipes for the mother cabbage we have in our fridge from the CSA this week.
It's in the 40's right now and getting dark by 6:15. Winter is looming.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
The morning got away from me!
Mr. T and I had a fabulous weekend in Montauk, sort of a mini honeymoon. Though we've been together for 7.5 years we only legally tied the knot in August, and haven't had time to go anywhere alone until this weekend. We brought our bikes and cruised around the whole area on Sunday which was actually sunny and not too cold. We even went in the ocean! The whole time we were enjoying our total freedom, eating when we wanted, going where ever whenever, sleeping at odd times, I kept trying to savor the moments. Next year at this time we won't be able to hop on our bikes and just get away from everything for 48 blissful hours!
I think the thing that most worries me is not being able to bike everywhere. It's my main form of exercise and transportation and losing that is pretty upsetting.
This morning a couple freelance projects actually kept me very busy so I haven't been on any search engines! Instead I am including a writing sample I submitted for a job last week. It's to write the annual report and newsletter for a homeless organization and they wanted a writing sample of a kids day at the zoo. I guess they didn't like what I wrote since I haven't heard back but I had fun with it so figure I will post it!
IT was a great day! I had no idea when I woke up this morning that I would get to see a camel - a real live camel! My mom and I don’t get to spend much time together because she is always working and I am always at school, or at after school, or at my babysitters’ house. For some reason she decided this morning to call in sick and we spent the whole day, the whole entire day, at the zoo! We saw monkeys and sea-lions and a walrus but camels have always been my favorite. I told her that when I grow up I want to live in Egypt and ride a camel to work.
My friend Alex has been to the zoo and told me about it, but I didn’t really believe him that a giraffe is taller than a basketball hoop. Now I can tell people about it, they really are that tall, it’s crazy. I had never seen so many animals in one place. Where we live we cant even have a dog or a cat and the people at the zoo get to have monkeys and camels! I wish we could live in the zoo. Though some parts of it were stinky! But mostly it was beautiful, no really, there were like trees and flowers and little paths that grown-ups couldn’t fit on. I never knew how big an elephant was either – it was huge.
People always call me monkey boy because I like to do flips on the monkey bars but I watched the monkeys for a long time, and they were really funny - especially when one of them stole a banana from the other one and then they started hitting each other - but I don’t think that’s me. I’m pretty sure that I am a camel. Sometimes I go a whole day without peeing, no really, just ask my babysitter, she thinks there’s something wrong with me. But then I pee in bed at night and mom starts to cry and then I cry so then I try to hold it in forever - like a camel.
Mom was in such a good mood that she even bought me an ice cream and a camel tattoo. I told her I am never going to take a bath again so the tattoo can be on my arm forever and ever and I will never forget our day at the zoo. She smiled but put water in the bathtub and made me get in.
I think the thing that most worries me is not being able to bike everywhere. It's my main form of exercise and transportation and losing that is pretty upsetting.
This morning a couple freelance projects actually kept me very busy so I haven't been on any search engines! Instead I am including a writing sample I submitted for a job last week. It's to write the annual report and newsletter for a homeless organization and they wanted a writing sample of a kids day at the zoo. I guess they didn't like what I wrote since I haven't heard back but I had fun with it so figure I will post it!
IT was a great day! I had no idea when I woke up this morning that I would get to see a camel - a real live camel! My mom and I don’t get to spend much time together because she is always working and I am always at school, or at after school, or at my babysitters’ house. For some reason she decided this morning to call in sick and we spent the whole day, the whole entire day, at the zoo! We saw monkeys and sea-lions and a walrus but camels have always been my favorite. I told her that when I grow up I want to live in Egypt and ride a camel to work.
My friend Alex has been to the zoo and told me about it, but I didn’t really believe him that a giraffe is taller than a basketball hoop. Now I can tell people about it, they really are that tall, it’s crazy. I had never seen so many animals in one place. Where we live we cant even have a dog or a cat and the people at the zoo get to have monkeys and camels! I wish we could live in the zoo. Though some parts of it were stinky! But mostly it was beautiful, no really, there were like trees and flowers and little paths that grown-ups couldn’t fit on. I never knew how big an elephant was either – it was huge.
People always call me monkey boy because I like to do flips on the monkey bars but I watched the monkeys for a long time, and they were really funny - especially when one of them stole a banana from the other one and then they started hitting each other - but I don’t think that’s me. I’m pretty sure that I am a camel. Sometimes I go a whole day without peeing, no really, just ask my babysitter, she thinks there’s something wrong with me. But then I pee in bed at night and mom starts to cry and then I cry so then I try to hold it in forever - like a camel.
Mom was in such a good mood that she even bought me an ice cream and a camel tattoo. I told her I am never going to take a bath again so the tattoo can be on my arm forever and ever and I will never forget our day at the zoo. She smiled but put water in the bathtub and made me get in.
Friday, October 9, 2009
You know you’re unemployed when. . .
1. The mail lady knows your name and asks where you’ve been when she doesn’t see you for a day or two.
2. It’s 9:00 AM and you are watching a rerun of last night’s Daily Show in your pajamas
You know you’re pregnant when:
1. You can’t walk down the street without stopping to pee at a coffee shop or 3
2. Your boobs wont stop aching
3. You can’t make it through the day, even an unemployed day, without a nap
4. You cry at news stories
I found 2 such interesting job opportunities on Craigslist today that I have decided to post them both:
Date: 2009-10-08, 3:02PM EDT
Reply to: job-twsh3-1412446726@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Go Around the World with 2 Children!
Hit 14 countries in twelve months! You’ll be nanny to our two children, a 2 year old and a newborn. We’ll spend about 30 days in each country, sightseeing and learning about the culture. My husband and I will be volunteering for charities/NGOs in some of the countries and will be with you and the kids during the day in others. Our goal is the make this life-changing, unforgettable trip!
The trip will begin in April 2010 and go through April 2011. We would like to have you begin working part-time (maybe two evenings per week) starting this November. This will allow you and our children to get to know each other beforehand. You will be expected to watch the children at our home in Sunnyside, Queens. Salary and hours are negotiable for this portion of the year. Salary while in America is subject to all legal taxes and deductions.
Below is a very general description of what we are expecting from you. Please feel free to ask us if you have any questions or if any of our instructions to you are unclear. We are happy to meet with you at any time to discuss any issues or concerns you might have.
* Feeding – prepare bottles & meals
* Personal Hygiene – diaper changing, cleaning & wiping, and bathing
* Putting children to bed
* Dressing
* Playtime – indoor and/or outdoor weather permitting
* Reading and singing to children
* Accompanying children to any scheduled activities or playdates
Salary, Benefits, and Hours
Your salary will total $10,000. Bi-weekly you will receive a check of $384.62 on the last working day of the week. There will be no taxes or deductions since you will be out of the country. Please be aware that this means you are not earning social security, paying into Medicare or Worker’s Compensation, and have no unemployment insurance.
Additionally, we will pay all your travel related expenses (i.e. all flights, food, etc.) and will pay 100% of your health insurance policy. We have chosen a comprehensive plan for our family and will offer you the same one. If you choose to have another plan, you may negotiate that with us.
You will receive two weeks paid vacation. You will receive 10 paid holidays of your choice, to be chosen at your start-date. There may be some days when your services will not be required for some or all of a day you are regularly scheduled to work. For instance, we may decide to take additional vacation or leave early for a weekend. You will be paid for these days. You will receive two paid sick days per year.
You will be living with our family in each location. Because of the nature of the trip, you will be working around the clock for five days and have two days and nights off each week.
If you are interested in volunteering with the charities/NGOs/non-profits, we can make time in your schedule for you to do so.
First Aid, CPR Training, and Child Care
We will cover the cost a First Aid class and CPR class for infants/children and will make the necessary arrangements for the class. We will also cover a class in infant/child care. You will complete these classes at least 2 months prior to the trip departure.
Where are you Going?
1. Peru
2. Brazil
3. Sierra Leone
4. Ghana
5. South Africa
6. Israel
7. India
8. Bhutan
9. Myanmar
10. Thailand
11. Cambodia
12. Vietnam
13. Laos
14. Copenhagen (for 1 week)
15. If your home country is not on this list, we may be able to add it to the itinerary. Please ask us during the interview.
Confidentiality
Please respect our privacy. While you are working in our house, you may see, hear or otherwise become privy to private information about our family. Please keep all information concerning our family confidential. You may not blog about the trip or publish anything about the trip during or after.
We want to welcome you to our family and hope you will enjoy the time you spend with us.
TV Production Company Casting for Real Life Witches! (Midtown West)
Date: 2009-10-09, 10:50AM EDT
Reply to: job-7qxum-1413547091@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Wanted: Witches with psychic abilities and witch craft capabilities
1. The mail lady knows your name and asks where you’ve been when she doesn’t see you for a day or two.
2. It’s 9:00 AM and you are watching a rerun of last night’s Daily Show in your pajamas
You know you’re pregnant when:
1. You can’t walk down the street without stopping to pee at a coffee shop or 3
2. Your boobs wont stop aching
3. You can’t make it through the day, even an unemployed day, without a nap
4. You cry at news stories
I found 2 such interesting job opportunities on Craigslist today that I have decided to post them both:
Go Around the World with 2 Children! (Africa, Asia, S America, etc!)
Date: 2009-10-08, 3:02PM EDT
Reply to: job-twsh3-1412446726@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Go Around the World with 2 Children!
Hit 14 countries in twelve months! You’ll be nanny to our two children, a 2 year old and a newborn. We’ll spend about 30 days in each country, sightseeing and learning about the culture. My husband and I will be volunteering for charities/NGOs in some of the countries and will be with you and the kids during the day in others. Our goal is the make this life-changing, unforgettable trip!
The trip will begin in April 2010 and go through April 2011. We would like to have you begin working part-time (maybe two evenings per week) starting this November. This will allow you and our children to get to know each other beforehand. You will be expected to watch the children at our home in Sunnyside, Queens. Salary and hours are negotiable for this portion of the year. Salary while in America is subject to all legal taxes and deductions.
Below is a very general description of what we are expecting from you. Please feel free to ask us if you have any questions or if any of our instructions to you are unclear. We are happy to meet with you at any time to discuss any issues or concerns you might have.
* Feeding – prepare bottles & meals
* Personal Hygiene – diaper changing, cleaning & wiping, and bathing
* Putting children to bed
* Dressing
* Playtime – indoor and/or outdoor weather permitting
* Reading and singing to children
* Accompanying children to any scheduled activities or playdates
Salary, Benefits, and Hours
Your salary will total $10,000. Bi-weekly you will receive a check of $384.62 on the last working day of the week. There will be no taxes or deductions since you will be out of the country. Please be aware that this means you are not earning social security, paying into Medicare or Worker’s Compensation, and have no unemployment insurance.
Additionally, we will pay all your travel related expenses (i.e. all flights, food, etc.) and will pay 100% of your health insurance policy. We have chosen a comprehensive plan for our family and will offer you the same one. If you choose to have another plan, you may negotiate that with us.
You will receive two weeks paid vacation. You will receive 10 paid holidays of your choice, to be chosen at your start-date. There may be some days when your services will not be required for some or all of a day you are regularly scheduled to work. For instance, we may decide to take additional vacation or leave early for a weekend. You will be paid for these days. You will receive two paid sick days per year.
You will be living with our family in each location. Because of the nature of the trip, you will be working around the clock for five days and have two days and nights off each week.
If you are interested in volunteering with the charities/NGOs/non-profits, we can make time in your schedule for you to do so.
First Aid, CPR Training, and Child Care
We will cover the cost a First Aid class and CPR class for infants/children and will make the necessary arrangements for the class. We will also cover a class in infant/child care. You will complete these classes at least 2 months prior to the trip departure.
Where are you Going?
1. Peru
2. Brazil
3. Sierra Leone
4. Ghana
5. South Africa
6. Israel
7. India
8. Bhutan
9. Myanmar
10. Thailand
11. Cambodia
12. Vietnam
13. Laos
14. Copenhagen (for 1 week)
15. If your home country is not on this list, we may be able to add it to the itinerary. Please ask us during the interview.
Confidentiality
Please respect our privacy. While you are working in our house, you may see, hear or otherwise become privy to private information about our family. Please keep all information concerning our family confidential. You may not blog about the trip or publish anything about the trip during or after.
We want to welcome you to our family and hope you will enjoy the time you spend with us.
TV Production Company Casting for Real Life Witches! (Midtown West)
Date: 2009-10-09, 10:50AM EDT
Reply to: job-7qxum-1413547091@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Wanted: Witches with psychic abilities and witch craft capabilities
Thursday, October 8, 2009
New blog
Welcome to my new blog documenting this unique and finite period in my life. This blog will continue until 1. I get a job, or 2. I have a baby. In either case i will no longer be an unemployed mom to be. In the mean time I will use this blog to keep sane through a potentially stressful stretch.
We started trying to conceive last November. I started looking for work last September. So though I smoked pot in college and love beer and coffee, conceiving proved to be easier than landing a job in this freakin economy - though not by a lot!
I am blogging from a coffee shop in Brooklyn which is full of fellow bloggers, unemployed New Yorkers, and at least one very pregnant mama to be.
The day I took my first positive pregnancy test I did not believe the results. Was it a faint plus or a minus that I just wanted to be a plus? I waited till my husband got home and we ate dinner and tried to talk about other things before taking the 2nd test. It still had a plus but a disturbingly pale plus. My boobs had been throbbing for days, but I was convinced it was bad PMS. I sent Mr. T to the drug store to buy a new test at 9:00 PM. I wanted a non-generic that was impossible to misread. He returned with one that read PREGNANT or NOT PREGNANT, pretty unambiguous! and 2 pints of ice cream. People in the check out line gave him funny looks. It said PREGNANT in no uncertain terms. We ate all the ice cream.
Finding a job is kind of like finding a husband, there are millions of potential ones out there but you only have to click with one to make it all work. But as my single friends can attest finding that one is way harder than you can ever imagine!
Here are a list of jobs that I have had interviews for, sometimes multiple interviews, in the last year. They all felt kind of like blind dates that wouldn't end:
1. Conference organizer for NYC grassroots media conference
2. Educational distribution manager for a documentary about Iraq
3. Temporary director of street vendor project - Urban Justice Center
4. Journalist Assistance Program Associate (Committee to Protect Journalists) 3 interviews and a test!
5. Site Development manager, Jewish Funds for Justice - worst interview of my life.
I will be updating this blog with my favorite Craigslists job postings from any given day. Potential jobs that I can't imagine ever being desperate enough to apply for.
Here is today's. It goes on way too long, so it's just half of it, but you should get the idea!
Date: 2009-10-07, 2:03PM EDT
Reply to: job-4jt7m-1410762905@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Hi. Even for Craig's List, this is going to be a strange ad. But read on – it’s strange but legit.
I'm a single, straight guy, in my early 40’s, recently moved to NYC, with almost no social circle here (and, even worse, I work on my own). No history of mental illnesss, jail time or listening to country music. Moving to NY has been fantastic, but the one thing is, I have been finding it hard to meet women. So I’m doing the normal, typical, rational thing that any guy in my position would do -- I'm looking to hire a female "wingman," that is, a "wingwoman," to break the ice for me in social situations.
Strange but true.
This is a real job I'm offering; it's not a personal ad in disguise, and I’m not a Nigerian scammer or a reality show producer, either. Perhaps more surprisingly, I'm also not a freak, weirdo or serial killer - I am just not good at walking up to a woman I don't know and getting beyond "Hi" and I want to do something about it. (Basically, I want to avoid this guy’s fate.)
This would be a part-time, occasional gig. Get-togethers would be in Manhattan or Brooklyn; sometimes weekend afternoons, sometimes evenings. (Generally speaking, NOT in bars or nightclubs. I am more of a Brooklyn Flea / The Moth / Big Terrific / Midsummer Night Swing type of guy. This is also my kind of thing.) Probably 2-5 hours per stint. We would only meet in public places and I would pay you ($20/hour) cash.
And you don't have to be single or even "unattached" to apply - there's no "hanky panky" involved. (I really don’t care if you have a boyfriend, girlfriend or significant other, as long as that person knows about and is cool with the situation.)
If you want to know more details about the arrangement, check out these articles:
Are You With Him? Why Yes, Want to Date Him?
Wingwomen (8 pages long)
I am NOT looking for someone to “lure” 100 unsuspecting women my way so I can sleep with and then dump them. This is SO not about that. At this point in my life, I’m not looking for 100 women, I’m looking for ONE special one. This is all about Quality Over Quanity.
And I’m probably going to hire several different “wingwomen,” part-time, depending on who’s interested in doing what kinds of things.
We started trying to conceive last November. I started looking for work last September. So though I smoked pot in college and love beer and coffee, conceiving proved to be easier than landing a job in this freakin economy - though not by a lot!
I am blogging from a coffee shop in Brooklyn which is full of fellow bloggers, unemployed New Yorkers, and at least one very pregnant mama to be.
The day I took my first positive pregnancy test I did not believe the results. Was it a faint plus or a minus that I just wanted to be a plus? I waited till my husband got home and we ate dinner and tried to talk about other things before taking the 2nd test. It still had a plus but a disturbingly pale plus. My boobs had been throbbing for days, but I was convinced it was bad PMS. I sent Mr. T to the drug store to buy a new test at 9:00 PM. I wanted a non-generic that was impossible to misread. He returned with one that read PREGNANT or NOT PREGNANT, pretty unambiguous! and 2 pints of ice cream. People in the check out line gave him funny looks. It said PREGNANT in no uncertain terms. We ate all the ice cream.
Finding a job is kind of like finding a husband, there are millions of potential ones out there but you only have to click with one to make it all work. But as my single friends can attest finding that one is way harder than you can ever imagine!
Here are a list of jobs that I have had interviews for, sometimes multiple interviews, in the last year. They all felt kind of like blind dates that wouldn't end:
1. Conference organizer for NYC grassroots media conference
2. Educational distribution manager for a documentary about Iraq
3. Temporary director of street vendor project - Urban Justice Center
4. Journalist Assistance Program Associate (Committee to Protect Journalists) 3 interviews and a test!
5. Site Development manager, Jewish Funds for Justice - worst interview of my life.
I will be updating this blog with my favorite Craigslists job postings from any given day. Potential jobs that I can't imagine ever being desperate enough to apply for.
Here is today's. It goes on way too long, so it's just half of it, but you should get the idea!
Do You Strike Up Conversations With Strangers in Elevators? (Manhattan/Brooklyn)
Date: 2009-10-07, 2:03PM EDT
Reply to: job-4jt7m-1410762905@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Hi. Even for Craig's List, this is going to be a strange ad. But read on – it’s strange but legit.
I'm a single, straight guy, in my early 40’s, recently moved to NYC, with almost no social circle here (and, even worse, I work on my own). No history of mental illnesss, jail time or listening to country music. Moving to NY has been fantastic, but the one thing is, I have been finding it hard to meet women. So I’m doing the normal, typical, rational thing that any guy in my position would do -- I'm looking to hire a female "wingman," that is, a "wingwoman," to break the ice for me in social situations.
Strange but true.
This is a real job I'm offering; it's not a personal ad in disguise, and I’m not a Nigerian scammer or a reality show producer, either. Perhaps more surprisingly, I'm also not a freak, weirdo or serial killer - I am just not good at walking up to a woman I don't know and getting beyond "Hi" and I want to do something about it. (Basically, I want to avoid this guy’s fate.)
This would be a part-time, occasional gig. Get-togethers would be in Manhattan or Brooklyn; sometimes weekend afternoons, sometimes evenings. (Generally speaking, NOT in bars or nightclubs. I am more of a Brooklyn Flea / The Moth / Big Terrific / Midsummer Night Swing type of guy. This is also my kind of thing.) Probably 2-5 hours per stint. We would only meet in public places and I would pay you ($20/hour) cash.
And you don't have to be single or even "unattached" to apply - there's no "hanky panky" involved. (I really don’t care if you have a boyfriend, girlfriend or significant other, as long as that person knows about and is cool with the situation.)
If you want to know more details about the arrangement, check out these articles:
Are You With Him? Why Yes, Want to Date Him?
Wingwomen (8 pages long)
I am NOT looking for someone to “lure” 100 unsuspecting women my way so I can sleep with and then dump them. This is SO not about that. At this point in my life, I’m not looking for 100 women, I’m looking for ONE special one. This is all about Quality Over Quanity.
And I’m probably going to hire several different “wingwomen,” part-time, depending on who’s interested in doing what kinds of things.
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